Calling on love

This couple ritual is different from e-mails, texts, chat, or other written forms, as it involves actually speaking to one another live while not in the same room together. 


Variations of phone version

  • Call on the phone at a specific time every day simply to say I love you, and nothing else. 
  • Calling at a certain time every day to talk for a little while is also a ritual used by many couples.  It is often more potent if the conversation is kept to the positive aspects of the relationship and nice plans, instead of the details of life or problems. 
  • Call and offer one complement and then say goodbye. 


Another quality of this ritual tends to be actually calling for one another when the couple is in the same general space, but they don’t know where the other one is exactly, or if they are in ear shot.


Variations of call-and-response version

  • Bat!  The other would reply Moth!
  • Whistling a tune, and the other would either repeat it, or continue the tune’s next phrase.  When one couple met, they would try and kiss while still whistling, invariably laugh, and that was that.
  • A series of claps
  • A low whistle
  • Clicking noise



  • Specific hour of the day
  • A married couple with children chose to talk to each other when the man was driving home from work.  That was their time when the kids weren’t the discussion or distraction.


Principal Purposes Served

  • Create stable touchstones
  • Build the relationship culture and history
  • Communicate values and beliefs
  • Foster trust
  • Emotional money in the bank